Christmas 2013
Dear
Family & Friends:
This
has been a year of healing for our family – healing from grief and
health and life issues that began in 2012 (which is why we did not send out
Christmas greetings last year).
Grief & Loss (or skip down to Healing or Today)
March
2012 began with me (Susan) visiting my parents in Michigan for a one-week vacation, and
staying on to provide (along with my brother) hospice care to our father. He suffered from COPD as a result of a
life-long smoking habit. His last few years, although painless, were not happy
ones as his health declined. All I can say is, “Don’t start. If you’ve started,
stop.” Dad passed away the end of March.
After
a short return to my home state to get things set up, I returned to Michigan to
stay with my mother, who is legally blind and cannot live alone. My brother and I
packed up our family home, got Mama relocated to an assisted living facility 20 minutes from his home, and put her house up for sale. It was
quite a saga, but the house on the little lake in southwest Michigan sold
quickly, and I returned home in mid-July, driving a U-haul filled
with furniture and memories of my family home.
As
a result of the extended stay in Michigan (4½ months), I had retired from my job effective April 1 and now had to figure out what to do with my life:
stay retired or find a new job? A former co-worker from let me know
her company was hiring; was I interested? Yes, and I interviewed.
Complicating
matters was that in mid-March, while caring for Dad, I suffered what was
determined to be a Posterior Vitreous Detachment (PVD) in my left eye. Or, as I
call them, “big honkin’ floaters.” In August, I suffered a PVD in my right eye.
After meeting with a retinal specialist, I decided to hold off surgery if I got
the new job. And I did.
I
started working October 8, 2012, for a company that provides project management for construction of wireless (i.e., cell phone)
infrastructure and upgrades. It’s heavy on the computer work, primarily in
Microsoft Excel, and interesting trying to view computer screens with big
honkin’ floaters that swoop down into your field of vision, and swoop back out
as you move your eyes. Left eye: left to right; right eye: right to left. Kind
of like old-fashioned windshield wipers.
On
December 22, 2012, my husband's brother suffered complications from blood clots
after an otherwise successful surgery. Steve got the call while he was working, and made arrangements to come home and pack a bag for Wisconsin. Our daughter and son-in-law were on their way from Michigan for
their first Christmas together at our home. Fortunately, they arrived before
Steve left. A few hours later, while still driving, Steve found out
his brother had passed away. He continued on to say goodbye to his only
sibling, then turned around and drove back home.
And
on a side note, several other passings contributed to the cumulative sense of loss and grief we experienced in 2012.
Healing
A memorial service was held for my brother-in-law in February 2013, a lovely tribute to a
unique, wonderful man. Friends from his many years in the travel business came
to honor him, including one who flew in from New Zealand. In May, the family gathered
to lay him to rest.
In
March, shortly before the one-year anniversary of my Dad’s death, I had surgery
on my left eye to remove the floaters (vitrectomy). The down-side of this
surgery is that it speeds up the development of cataracts. Even as I waited for
a quieter period at work to schedule the vitrectomy on my right eye, the vision
in my left eye was deteriorating, slowly but surely.
On
October 8, the one-year anniversary of starting my new job, I had the
vitrectomy on my right eye. And on December 17, I had cataract surgery on my
left eye. Three days later I got a contact lens for my right eye, so when it’s
in I can see so very clearly to drive and watch TV without glasses! Now I just
need to get used to reading glasses and the need to carry them around with me
everywhere. I anticipate that in April or so I might have to have cataract
surgery on my right eye. Three eye surgeries in one year: crazy. But I can
emphatically state that cataract surgery is very easy, so if you’re nervous and
have been putting it off, don’t. FYI: Due to my mother’s blindness, she does
NOT know about any of my eye surgeries; mum’s the word!
So,
eyes have healed (mostly); we have passed the one-year anniversaries of the deaths
of our family and friends; and we are on the road to recovery. We could not
have made it through without our family and friends. Those of you on Facebook
saved me while I was living in Michigan last year, and continue to uplift me
daily.
Today
I
end our story on a positive note, with renewed optimism and hopefulness for
2014. Love, peace, and blessings to you and yours this holiday season.
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